Life.

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A year ago, I was a wreck. I grew up in the church so I was still living for God, but dancing with the devil at the same time. Drowning my problems with poison instead of facing them. Hanging with the wrong crowds and sleeping in the wrong bed. I did not recognize the woman in the mirror. She constantly cried for help. She needed love and was searching for happiness in all of the wrong places.

This year I am thankful and blessed because Jesus saved me once again. Surrendering my life over to Christ and killing my flesh was one of the best decisions I have ever made. I am brand new.

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I am a woman after God’s heart. I act, talk, and walk differently. I stopped drinking, swearing, clubbing, dating randoms, disrespecting others, I am saving myself for marriage, and I cut off everything that is disapproving in my Father’s eyes. I am at peace and I have found what I’ve always searched for; love. It was always there, however I was too blind to see.

I have amazing people in my life who I love dearly. My family, whom I pray for more than myself are also changing right before my eyes for the better. I am grateful for my answered prayers and thankful for my growth. Although I am battling hashimotos thyroiditis and both hyperthyroidism & hypothyroidism, I am blessed to be breathing another day.

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When I prayed for sisters after God’s heart, the Lord showed me my real friends and then allowed me to make new friendships; sisters. These women are incredible and they continue to amaze me daily. With the challenges they face, they don’t give up. Always looking to take on a challenge. I learn from them and they learn from me. We have the same morals, standards, and we are always laughing. We accept each other’s goofy personalities but can still have serious conversations about life and about God.

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I have been friends with Rashida since the 7th grade. We were always together and up to trouble every time we were. We went on adventures together and would sound like hyenas when we laugh. We would just give each other a look and would laugh for a while. 9 years later, I will get to hold her mini-me!

Time sure flies and I am glad I get to share this moment with her. She’s a strong mother already. Always on her feet and I have not heard a complaint once! I got to feel her baby girl’s foot today and my heart melted. I will spoil and love her as my own. I cannot wait to meet you in a few weeks!

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My little sister will only take a picture if she’s doing a selfie. She was not having it with me trying to take her picture. She gets it from our father. He rarely takes pictures! I’m so used to it because I am always in front and behind the camera since birth! I was actually born with a camera. Just kidding. :p

On Thanksgiving we prayed together once again. She grabbed a plate just so that we can say grace. As an older sister, I have to set an example for my siblings. They are always watching, so if I mess up then it will be 10x’s harder to get them out of my mess. She now asks me questions about God and the bible. I continue to pray that my family gets back in church again.

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The sky was beautiful today. It rained for a few minutes, then it was sunny again.

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Genesis 9:12-17

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I wrote a poem for the baby. I want Rashida to read this to her. I haven’t written a poem in a while, but when she asked me to recite a poem, I couldn’t help but to accept. I’m still rusty and I noticed I rhymed once I finished. Not bad!

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See you in a few weeks baby girl!

– Crystal

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